Giving our life & health update from a low point on our healing journey.
Hello, Family & Friends,
Our family would like to reach out with an update. This is a vulnerable one for us. The longer we’re on this healing journey through cancer, the more our pride and image are stripped away, and we’re being refined. We are humbled. The Lord’s provision reigns over our lives in a beautiful way, and we are grateful for his strength, love, and promises.
This post is going to cover the reality of our lives right now, which includes:
· Job loss
· Insurance coverage hardship
· Cancer bills & payment plans
· Tumor growth & stage 3 active cancer update
· PET scan – plans to move it up from May 5th to ASAP in April
If you’ve been following me on Instagram (@consciouslykaley) I shared some stories about these updates already, which you can find saved in my highlights.
This is difficult but we need to ask for help.
If you’d rather forego the life update and head directly to ways to help, please scroll to the bottom of the page. We are grateful for every prayer, gift, and effort made on our behalf.
Praise Report
Before I share our life/health update, I want to share a praise report. On Tuesday, March 14th, I shared a short version of my testimony at Chestnut Mountain Church for Women’s Worship Night.
It was a night based around prayer. I was able to share about the power of prayer throughout my suffering, and I even talked about divorce and cancer as part of my story for the first time. The picture above is from that special night.
Truth be told, I almost didn’t make it. That day, I was dealing with such fatigue and a headache that I cancelled. I laid in our bedroom in the dark for three hours that afternoon. I asked my mom to ask for prayer that I would make it and be able to share. At 5pm, I woke up and made it to church by 6pm. I shared my testimony at 6:30pm. All the glory to God.
If you’d like to hear the recording, please send me an email and I’ll shoot you the link kaley@kaleyshawley.com
Health/Life Update
For so long now, we have tried to persevere on our own about many of our needs. Over the past year, many of you have reached out wanting to help us. At times, we have accepted the help, but for the most part we have turned it down. There are a lot of reasons for that, but the greatest being our pride and avoidance of shame. Why is it that we feel shame going through our suffering? We’re not entirely sure, but I can assure you it’s a real feeling for us.
When I was diagnosed, we were told that I have the “good cancer”. You often hear it said about thyroid cancer. It’s said because of its treatability and relatively favorable survival rates. A study was done to determine the reaction of selected patients with thyroid cancer to perceptions of their illness as conveyed to them, directly or indirectly, by health care professionals, their family members, and their support network. In some such patients, the impression that their cancer is considered to be a good cancer is consistently viewed as being a positive experience. It’s not a positive experience.
No evidence suggests that telling patients their thyroid cancer is a “good cancer” is helpful or reassuring. I have a lot to say about this, at this point, but I will save it for another day.
I’ll leave you with this to ponder, for now: No other cancer controls the function of your mind quite like thyroid cancer.
Your thyroid’s main job is to control the speed of your metabolism (metabolic rate), which is the process of how your body transforms the food you consume into energy. All the cells in your body need energy to function. When your thyroid isn’t working properly, it can impact your entire body.
Thyroid fatigue may keep you from concentrating or focusing on tasks. You may have memory problems, both in the short and long term. You may lack motivation to do anything, even the activities you like. You may also feel nervous, irritable, or anxious.
When your thyroid isn’t functioning, you can strive for quality of life, but it may not be there at times. Sometimes it lasts for days and other times it can last for weeks.
Now, get this: I don’t have a thyroid!
I rely on a daily pill (Tirosint) and regular lab work to ensure that I can function in my everyday life. The long-term effects of thyroid medication include weight fluctuations, sensitivity to heat, joint pain, increased sweating, hormone imbalance, and possibly even autoimmune dysfunction.
I believed that if I went through with a total thyroidectomy and radiation, that it would return my quality of life back to normal. Naïve! We removed an organ from my body. I’m convinced more than ever, now, that it had a purpose, and I will forever struggle to compensate for its removal. What a journey.
My experience with thyroid cancer has been anything but the “norm”.
I had surgery to remove my thyroid and cancerous lymph nodes. I went through a high dose of radioactive iodine (RAI). Yet here I am still dealing with metastatic stage 3 thyroid cancer with growing tumors. Depending on the resource, it’s my understanding that I may or may not be considered stage 3 due to my age. If I were over the age of 55, I would most certainly be considered stage 3. One thing they don’t tell you about being a cancer patient is that health professionals across the board will have varying opinions.
For most thyroid cancer patients, surgery alone will achieve the most desired results, which is to be monitored on thyroid medication with no signs of cancer cells. For another group of thyroid cancer patients, radioactive iodine (RAI) is administered to take care of any residual cancer cells. Most of the time, this is as far as it goes to ensure you’re past the cancer part of your journey.
On my journey, we have not achieved the desired results through the standard care plan. We continue down the path of treatment, unsure if I will ever live again without disease.
The endocrinologist I’ve had thus far on my cancer journey recently left our local practice. Last week, I met with my newly assigned endocrinologist who works alongside Levine Cancer Institute for my care. I was pleasantly surprised by our meeting together. I appreciated his knowledge and expertise. He had read through my charts and notes, which I had not expected. He was direct with me, which is what I prefer.
A few things he said stood out to me. For one, he let me know that my cancer presentation is rare. I think I knew this, but it didn’t sink in until this moment. We discussed how my micro sites of sub centimeter cancer are everywhere in my cervical, supraclavicular, and clavicular lymph areas on both sides. He mentioned seeing 7 sites from my lymph node mapping at the end of last year. This means it’s unlikely that even a second surgery would achieve “clean lines,” due to the vast locations on either side. My disease presentation is like a burst explosion. Sometimes disease can present grouped or on one side.
Lastly, he reminded me that I need to take my health seriously. I told him how much I’ve been struggling to figure out my correct thyroid medication and keep up my energy. He said, “I’m not surprised to hear that. You’ve been through a lot and you’re living with active cancer.”
At this same appointment, I met with my Oncology Assistant Nurse Navigator, Andria Caton, for the first time in-person. What an absolute blessing this woman is. She recently won the ‘Innovator’ award from the Georgia Center for Oncology Research and Education. Meeting with Angie on March 22nd was a divine appointment from God. I was so blessed and encouraged to connect with her.
For the past year, I explained to her how oncology has reached out to me with assistance and resources that I have not investigated because I believed I had the “good cancer.” Now, we are still on this journey, at an incredibly low point, where my health is declining, and Michael has been laid off from his job. She immediately stopped me and said, “There is no good cancer”.
She went on to further explain to me that Northeast Georgia Health System receives approximately 3,000 cancer diagnoses each year. Of the 3,000 diagnoses, only 75-90 are between the ages of 18 and 39. I’m currently part of their study for Young Adults with Cancer through the Northeast Georgia Health System. I’m one of 75. There’s maybe one or two more with thyroid cancer, but I’m the only one with aggressive, active cancer. This statistic put things into perspective for me.
She connected me again with all the resources available to me. This week I spoke with their therapist and their chaplain. I was presented with financial assistance paperwork. I was submitted into the Thumbs Up organization, and presented with local non-profit organizations who work with cancer patients. She also connected me to other local adolescent and young adult (AYA) cancer patients, which has been such a gift to me. Other cancer patients on similar journeys who “get it” have brought a new sense of community to me on this extremely lonely journey. I’m so grateful to be in touch with AYA thrivers and survivors.
In addition to these local resources, my sister-in-law, Joy Shawley, has offered her resources and expertise. I’m incredibly blessed to have Joy for a sister-in-law. Joy is a Senior Development Manager for the American Cancer Society. What a connection to have, right? She has helped organize relays for life, for years. Her husband, David, has been in remission from leukemia for over ten years. Joy’s family knows firsthand the devastation and hardship that comes with a cancer diagnosis. She recently sent us information about financial assistance from programs affiliated with the American Cancer Society, which we are currently looking into. We are currently on 14 monthly payment plans paying down our debts from cancer with an increasing balance from week to week.
I’m often told with cancer to “take care of myself” or to “make sure to rest”. But let me tell you… it’s not easy to take care of myself or rest walking through job loss and carrying the kind of debt that we do. Each day we have to look at each other and actively calm our anxiety and worry.
There are days where cortisol is coursing through my body and it’s out of control. It’s hard to heal when your mind is panicked, but we do our best to trust the Lord to provide. Each time we’ve wanted to completely freak out or give-up, we are reminded that he’s shown up in every time of need. The anxiety and the stress don’t serve us, and we are better off to hand it over to him. 1 Peter 5:7
Joy has offered to fundraise for us. She is starting a new fundraising opportunity through GiveSendGo. This is in addition to our existing GoFundMe. GiveSendGo does not have fees associated with their platform and is an organization we are happy to support. If you would like to give to our GiveSendGo, please find the link here: www.givesendgo.com/kaleyshawley
It will also now be linked on this blog site in various places.
Michael was laid off from his job on February 28th. It came as a shock to us, and we were completely devastated. Michael’s previous company employed 25 people and they had to layoff 4. The layoffs were not due to performance and were decided upon based on seniority (how long each employee has been with the company). Michael was one of their most recent hires.
Unfortunately, our insurance policy ended the date of the layoff. As you can imagine, this created some panic within our lives. Our main source of income was gone overnight and our insurance policy that allowed my out-of-state care abruptly ended. We were offered two weeks of severance and one month of paid COBRA. Due to the expensive nature of the COBRA plan, we elected to only continue the policy for me. Without opting for COBRA, I would not have been able to continue my treatment at Levine Cancer Institute, which we just recently established.
Marketplace plans do not allow for referrals to other states. Now, we can carry this COBRA plan until August 31st but it’s not affordable. When Michael can secure a new job, we will attempt to reinstate the referral, but until then we can carry this policy no later than August 31st. Emory is always an option, but we feel we were sent to the experts at Levine for a reason. Also, anytime you transfer primary care, they require you to perform all the entry lab work and testing again. I JUST finished establishing at Levine in January/February. It’s disheartening to think that I would have to go through it all again.
During the time where we had just received the layoff news and had not yet elected COBRA, I determined that my tumors were growing. I’ve been having pain, my thyroglobulin and TSH levels are trending in the wrong direction, and I’ve overall started to struggle with energy, brain fog, keeping an appetite, and hormonal imbalance. I also have pain radiating in my clavicle.
I was also in the process of figuring out if my recent abdomen pain is a stomach ulcer, but we have been unable to complete the necessary tests due to our insurance delay. Now, we plan to complete my PET scan first, then proceed with an endoscopy at a later date based on the finding of the PET scan.
In the meantime, I have stopped taking my supplements prescribed to me by my naturopath to help my deficiencies, metabolic support, and hormonal balance. I stopped taking them because of my abdomen pain, but also because we were becoming extremely pressed and budget conscious with the layoff. I regret, now, that I ceased to take them. They clearly were helping me, and I’ve since developed anemia.
My protocol with my naturopath has been the primary healing work for me on this healing journey, no doubt. I believe in it wholeheartedly and it’s been extremely discouraging to discontinue. With your help, I would love to get back on track during this job transition.
Michael immediately started looking for a new job once he became laid off. He updated his professional resume and applied to several positions. Right now, he’s in the interview process for a couple of positions. They appear to be promising leads, but we don’t have a job offer yet.
Please, if you are willing to view Michael’s resume and send it out to your connections, email me at kaley@kaleyshawley.com and I will get it to you. He is a highly skilled customer success professional with management experience. He has worked in the industries of digital products, healthcare, and real estate. For the past 9 years, he has worked a remote job. So, he can essentially work for any company remotely.
Recently, we leased an office on the Gainesville Square less than a mile from our house. Michael typically works from this office location, but lately I’ve been using it to take Zoom meetings and consultations.
This is a great transition into how you can help our family.
We have no shame talking about our layoff situation or our cancer journey. We have recently become open books, willing to talk about every hard thing. Our journey has brought us to this place of need, and like I said, we are humbled.
How You Can Help the Shawley Family
Breaking this down as specifically as we can. Written by Michael and Kaley.
Our Work
Kaley is a REALTOR® with Keller Williams Lanier Partners. Kaley can help you with buying or selling in any state as a referral agent. Locally and nationwide, Kaley partners with experienced Realtors to provide an ultra-serviced experience by working as part of a curated team. When you hire Kaley, you hire her partners and transaction coordinator at no additional cost to you, only better service. As a referral agent, Kaley is involved in each transaction as a point of contact and accountability to ensure that your real estate needs are taken care of. Please reach out to Kaley with any opportunities regarding local or national real estate needs. She can point you in the right direction ensuring that the best contacts are involved to take care of you. She considers this service “real estate concierge” … forming the best team to produce the best results. She loves to talk about the value of these services, so please reach out to her for her to explain more. Every consultation is absolutely FREE.
Kaley is also a dōTERRA Essential Oils Leader. Kaley became a consultant in February 2022, right before her cancer diagnosis in March 2022. Recently, Kaley has built a wellness team called Dearly Loved Oils. She is passionate about sharing essential oils and non-toxic products with others. Overnight, Kaley had to completely reduce her toxin load when she was diagnosed with cancer. Now, she shares the work she’s done to convert our home into a “low tox” environment utilizing products she trusts. She teaches others how to do the same. With every dōTERRA order and purchase through Kaley’s link, you benefit her efforts and, ultimately, our family. dōTERRA sells more than essential oils. dōTERRA has supplements, household cleaning products, laundry detergent, dishwasher pods, dish soap, shampoo & conditioner, sunscreen, a baby line, body products, collagen, whey protein, fiber, and much more. Please reach out to Kaley with questions. She prefers to educate you and help you with your initial purchase to help you understand the value, show you the monthly promos, and utilize additional promo codes for free product. There are no enrollment fees or monthly order minimums! You get the wholesale pricing when you buy. You also get invited into Kaley’s private oils community on Instagram and Facebook. Kaley looks forward to teaching you about essential oils and low tox living in an online class soon!
Dearly Loved Oils Facebook Page
Michael is actively looking for a new job. Please join us in praying that Michael secures a position soon. Please pray that the new position would bless us with optimal insurance coverage that we can work with to keep our care in North Carolina at Levine. You can add Michael on LinkedIn to share his resume post from his main page. Additionally, if you have any leads for Michael or wish to view his resume, please contact us at kaley@kaleyshawley.com Thank you!
If you are familiar with Gary Chapman’s book The Five Love Languages, we are going to list-out helpful ways to support us by love language.
Gifts
We are going to be honest and let you know that monetary gifts are the most helpful right now. We are trying to stay afloat until Michael secures a new job.
There are multiple ways to give… which we will list the avenues below. Additionally, we are providing an itemized list of some of our expenses we are looking to cover.
| Weekly Childcare with our Nanny | $245.00/week |
| Gas – to go to and from Levine Cancer Institute in North Carolina & Emory in Atlanta | $300.00/month |
| Monthly Deep House Cleaning with Amy’s Green Cleaning, Laura Quarles 706-878-8182 | $140.00/month |
| Groceries | $150.00/week |
| Walmart Delivery | $15.00/month |
| Kaley’s medication & supplements | $1,000.00/month |
| Payment Plan Monthly Minimums – Medical Bills (almost like having another mortgage) | $1,350.00/month |
| Patient Navigation System – Picnic Health | $40.00/month |
| Counseling/Therapy | $200.00/month |
| Power/Utilities | $325.00/month |
Venmo – @kaleyshawley
PayPal – @kaleyshawley / email klyjean@gmail.com
GoFundMe – link
GiveSendGo – link
Our Amazon Wish List – updated regularly
Shopping Gift cards – Kroger, Aldi, Publix, Walmart, Target, The Fresh Market, Sprouts, Amazon
Restaurant Gift cards (most of these are for Michael/the kids because of Kaley’s strict diet):
Local: Alpha Gyro Grill, Meadowlark, Avocados, Mellow Mushroom, Sweet Magnolias, 2Dog, El Tepache, Atlas, Inman Perk.
National Chains: Chipotle, ChickFilA, Panera Bread, Five Guys, Jersey Mikes, First Watch.
Other gift cards – AirBnB, Hotels, Delta
Michael has not been home to Missouri since he moved to Gainesville in 2020. We had plans to go last Christmas but had to cancel last minute due to Kaley’s health when we found out about her cancer reoccurrence. If Kaley’s health allows, we will be planning a trip there as soon as possible. So far, his family has had to come to us every time.
Cash, checks, gift cards – reach out to Joy Shawley joyshawley@gmail.com or Kaley kaley@kaleyshawley.com for our home address.
Other (Non-monetary) Gifts
Diapers
Paper products – always in need of toilet paper and paper towels
Fresh Produce, local honey, or organic teas from the store or the Farmer’s Market
Sweatshirts size small (with no pockets or hood) for Kaley to wear to the clinics – She likes to rep Georgia, positive messages, fun colors, and truth
Beanies – Kaley wears beanie hats year-round to appointments
Words of Affirmation/ Quality Time/ Physical Touch
Thank you to those who spend time with us. Thank you for meeting us in our mess and showing up. Thank you for physically making sure we see your face. There are just a few of you. We don’t get out much. Normally, we love hosting people in our home and making social plans, but things like that feel impossible right now.
Thank you to those who check in with texts, phone calls, handwritten notes, messages, etc. We know who you are.
It’s hard for us to have brief, surface level conversation and we apologize to those of you who ask us “How are you?” We don’t know how to answer your question, honestly. We feel like there’s not enough time to give an honest answer. We tend to feel like if say anything other than “Good. How are you?” It can be jarring or uncomfortable and we don’t wish to make anyone feel that way. If you have texted us “How are you?” and we haven’t responded… we are sorry. On text, if you ask us literally any other question… we do better to respond! For the “How are you?” questions… we hope this lengthy, honest blog update will suffice.
Another thing we tend to hear a lot of, from a lot of well-meaning friends, is “Don’t hesitate to reach out to us if you need anything.” We can honestly say that we believe you, but because of our regular chaos (see Moses etc) we are not likely to reach out. Feel free to just show up and enjoy our awkward with us! The people that insert themselves into our lives by taking any kind of action are so appreciated.
This journey can be so lonely at times. Kaley would welcome if you would help her take the kids to the park, ride and wait with her at her doctor visits (especially blood labs) or pick her up for something lighthearted and fun. Help her at the grocery store.
Thank you for lifting us up in prayer. We believe prayer is the greater work on this whole journey. It encourages us more than you know, to know that you are praying for us.
If you feel led to lay hands on Kaley, to pray for healing, we welcome you to come over and do so. This has happened a few times along her healing journey, and we are always so moved by the peace and encouragement it brings to know that Kaley’s healing is being prayed for.
Lastly, you can support Kaley’s efforts to share her story by reposting her blog, sharing her posts, or following along on her social media (another form of community/communication for her): Instagram – @consciouslykaley & @kaleyshawleyrealestate
Kaley is in the process of transferring all her cancer updates to @consciouslykaley in order to keep @kaleyshawleyrealestate for real estate.
Acts of Service
We always need help picking up our house. Kaley is often too weak and fatigued to mop floors, clean showers/tubs & toilets, do multiple loads of laundry, wash bedding & rugs, etc. We would welcome anyone willing to give us an extra hand.
Come juice with Kaley. Every week we wash and prep fruits and vegetables to juice. This process can take anywhere from 3-6 hours a week. Mady Herndon has helped Kaley from time to time and she acknowledges that it’s quicker and more enjoyable!
Week to week we have a mound of boxes that need to be recycled at the recycling center. If you would like to come take apart and fold boxes, then haul them away from our garage… please! It’s something off Michael’s plate.
Send a handyman or offer your handy service. We always have projects that Michael wants to get to but has trouble finding the time.
Right now, we are in a season where it takes all our energy just to get through the day with a one-year-old and two other children under the age of 6. We prioritize being present with our kids and know that the other stuff can wait. Raising three young children is hard enough for a healthy family. It is much harder with chronic illness.
You can always come and watch our kids in our home to give us some time together, even if we’re in the next room. Most days, we feel like we don’t have time to communicate or connect with each other without it revolving around the logistics of our lives right now. Trust us, our kids love the visits and attention. They will put on a show for you any day of the week.
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Thank you in advance for loving our family enough to read this update. It takes a lot of energy to write. We believe in sharing our updates and asking for help and prayer. Our hope is that one day we can pay it forward in other instances of hardship and suffering. If it’s you one day, please know that we will do our best to be there for you. We know what it’s like to be on the receiving end, going through the trials.
Under the mercy,
Michael & Kaley Shawley
michael.w.shawley@gmail.com / kaley@kaleyshawley.com
GiveSendGo | GoFundMe | doTERRA | Amazon
